have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
