Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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