Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
