Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Randomize
