The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
