I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
