I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
