if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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