Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
