WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
