Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Randomize