remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
