i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
She's just so happy...and so naked.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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