either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
