Kiss
Puke
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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