hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
