He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
