What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
