i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
