He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
