we're blogging at a bar
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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