Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize