the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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