I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
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