MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
