Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
