I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
