did you get engaged???
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Randomize
