at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
