well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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