Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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