are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
