hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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