Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
