wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
