"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
