cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
This is the high leading the old right now
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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