well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
