check it out our google latitudes are spooning
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
