What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
