It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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