no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
