Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
So I just went to clothing optional bar
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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