is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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