this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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