Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
