It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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