There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
