redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
