He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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