Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
